I JUMPED (head first)

Now that I'm learning how to be a business woman I've been faced with making some rather scary (yet exciting) business decisions. Although making decisions to better my photography business is a rewarding process, the initial emotion I feel is fear. I have a fear of making a bad decision, or not getting the results that I am looking for from the choices I make. It's like jumping out of a plane. Although you decide to take on the adventure, you soon realize that the adventure is in conjunction with many significant risks. Jumping out of the plane offers a thrilling journey but the anticpation of landing becomes a quick reality. Jumpers desire a smooth, painless landing, one that leaves them satisfied and safe. When I jump into a decision, I seek a smooth landing as well. I'm often anxious that the landing will not be as smooth as I hope, fearing that I will be left unsatisfied, or in a worse position than I first started.

Last Thursday I made the scariest business decision yet! Although I anticipate more intimidating decisions in the future, this one has the record- at this point, any way.  Why was it so scary, you might wonder. Well, I'll tell you: EXPENSE. Yes, as in expensive. Quite frankly, I've decided to take on a huge expense I've decided to take on a huge investment.

As many of you may know, I have been shooting with a Canon Rebel xTi. My camera has truly been a blessing. It has allowed me to persue a passion I did not predict would unexpectedly floursih into a business. I appreciate all that it has done for this young passion of mine, and I am thankful to my husband for purchasing it for me 5 years ago- thanks Honey. Although my camera has had much to offer, the time has come to move on. And up.

After reading hundreds of reviews and spending countless hours in front of my computer reasearching which camera I wanted to purchase, I've finally make a decision. I'm ready to share it with you:

I ordered a Canon 5d mark II.   YIKES!

OMG, mini panic attack! Ahhh :) Ok, so as you can probably tell, this decision is thrilling- but I'll admit, it has not come easy for me. I've wanted to upgrade for months now but failed to realize that choosing just the right camera would be so strenuous. I've been torn between the Canon 70d and the 5d mark ii. I've gone back and forth forty-eleven times (I made that number up to express the magnitude of the amount). At the end of the day, the decision came down to choosing the camera I know with all my heart I'll be the happiest with. I never want to look back and say, "I should have gotten the ___." So, I did some serious soul searching and with the support of Brandon I made the decision to go with the 5d mark ii. YIPEE! Although I'm overly joyed by this new piece of equipment, I still face the fear. I reassure myself with thoughts like, "If I don't invest in myself, who will invest in me?" or "If I don't take a risk I won't be able to get where I want to go" and of course, "If I don't have a BA camera how am I going to take BA pictures?" These are just 3 of the many thoughts that I have, still after ordering it last week. (Side Note: All cameras of this model are backordered. They are made in Japan but because of the earthquake, shipping has been delayed. I'm "tentatively projected" to get my camera in 2 weeks. Oh, the anticiaption!)

Making such a HUGE jump is scary, yes, but even more than that it's fullfilling. I am consumed with excitement knowing that I am growing as a photographer and a business woman. Taking on the risk can be intimidating, but I am determined to take on all the challenges that accompany developing myself and what I want to become.

I introduce my full-frame, 21.1 megapixel, 50-25600 ISO, 3.89 fps BEAUTY:

“Do not fear risk. All exploration, all growth is calculated. Without challenge people cannot reach their higher selves. Only if we are willing to walk over the edge can we become winners.”